It took an hour to get from the satellite ER to the main hospital. In the ambulance the RN was trying to make small talk with me but I was so sick to my stomach I couldn't carry on a conversation. We arrived at the ER doors and they made their way to the elevator and up to the 5th floor where the PICU (pediatric intensive care unit) was. When we got to the room a whole team of people were waiting for us. I wish I could give details about what happened next but mostly what I can describe is him being moved to a bed and hooked up to a ton of equipment. They tried and tried to get blood from his fingers and then his toes but they were all so cold they couldn't. They couldn't even draw blood from the IV they had put in at the ER.
About an hour after we got there the DO told me that he wanted to place an A-line, which is an IV that goes into his artery. This way they would be able to not only get blood easier and not have to keep poking him but also it would keep track of his blood pressure etc more accurately. I told him that I wasn't sure about it and I needed to call my sister. He was very nasty with me and told me that he wouldn't have ordered it if he didn't think it was necessary.
I called my sister and she told me while there were risks if he needed it then go for it. I told him I would allow it. The nurse asked me if I wanted to leave the room and I told her no. I wasn't going to pass out so I was staying. They put EMLA cream (which is a topical numbing cream) on his wrists and gave Carson medication to make him sleepy and then they put Lidocaine into the skin and told me that it would only numb the surface and it would still be painful. I stood and watched as this asshat poked and poked and poked and poked trying to find the artery in his left arm. Carson was blissfully unaware as he was drugged into dreamland. He finally stopped after about 45 minutes and decided to try the other arm. I know he and the nurses could tell that I was getting madder and madder. With the right arm he didn't even numb it up! With the first poke Carson woke up screaming. He dosed him 2 more times with the sleepy stuff (I'm not sure exactly what he gave him so I'm just calling it that lol) and Carson STILL screamed. He finally dosed him one last time and when Carson still fought him he was telling him, "Carson! You're a beast! If I had that much I'd be out until next week!" Then I noticed that he hadn't used the Lidocaine on this arm. He told me he thought it distorted the landmarks and that's why he couldn't find the artery. So guess what? After a half hour of poking I told him enough was enough. Carson needed a break, I needed a break, we were done. He was pissed and I didn't care. He left the room in a huff and I apologized to the nurse and told her I wasn't trying to be a bitch it was just that he wasn't getting anywhere and someone had to stand up for my little guy and if no one else was going to tell him to stop I would.
After he left Carson finally fell asleep. By then it was 2 am and I was exhausted. I climbed into bed with him and slept for a while. The nurses were nice to keep the monitor on silent and wouldn't turn the lights on to check on him. Being in the ICU we were basically in a giant fishbowl and some lights were dim but stayed on so they could see him from the hallway.
I woke up in the morning to the sound of voices outside the door. Rounds. Carson's nurse Tiffany was taking vitals as I listened to what was being said outside. I only caught bits and pieces but it was the doctor from the night before and he was telling the new crew about what was going on. I heard him say that Carson's sodium and potassium levels were high and if they screwed up and brought them down too fast his brain would swell causing damage or death. With that I was wide awake. Things were starting to fall into place in my mind. Carson was dying. That's why he was cold. His body was shutting down. What if we had waited to take him to the doctor in the morning? Would he have survived? Would he survive NOW?
I reached over to hold Carson's hand and found a Tegaderm patch on his wrist with EMLA cream under it. I looked at Tiffany and told her that I would not allow them to try again for the A-line. She just nodded and told me to tell the doc when he came in. Almost right on cue another doctor walked into the room and told me he was going to try to get blood from Carson's arm. If he could then the A-line wouldn't be necessary. He got a vein with one try. He filled a few vials of blood and was gone. Tiffany said that if we needed blood any time the rest of the day we would call for him because he could've placed that line the night before by throwing it from the other room he was so good.
Mike showed up around 11 am after taking Baylee to my moms and brought some things from home. Carson was having a hard time waking from all of the anesthesia from the night before but as soon as he heard his daddy's voice his little eyes popped open. Mike showed him that he had brought his iPad but he was still too tired to play with it. By this time Carson was looking like my son again. He had color and his face wasn't sunken in anymore. If anything it was puffy around the eyes, probably from all the fluids they were giving him. After a bit he woke up enough to want to get out of bed. With help steadying him and holding all of his cords he slowly walked around the bottom of the bed to the other side and started rummaging around in my purse looking for my car keys. He was ready to get the hell out of Dodge. Mike picked him up and you could see the relief in both their faces. He returned Carson to the bed and he started playing his iPad... with his foot. Both of his arms had IV's at one point but one had been taken out of this left arm and moved to the right so that one arm had 3 and the other had none but was still very sore.
The attending physician came in and told us that he was going to be moved to the diabetes/endocrinology wing of the hospital at some point during the day. She was concerned about how sleepy he was but when I told her how much they had doped him up she said she had heard about it. I told her that I wasn't very happy about it either and she said she had heard that too. She apologized and told me that it came down to experience. It's all fine and good to teach in a hospital but when it's the ICU I think people SHOULD have experience. You fuck up there and it could be life or death and for someone the night before it was death. They coded while I was on the phone with Mike giving him an update. Not that I'm blaming that doctor for it. It just happened. Imagine that. Losing your child on Christmas. That was almost my reality. That's such a hard pill to swallow.
More later
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