Being Thankful

It has been a busy few days around here with Thanksgiving and both Baylee and Mike home too.  Tomorrow will be back to the same old routine.

On Thursday we went to my mom's house for Thanksgiving "dinner" even though we ate at noon so that one of my older sisters could go to her in-laws house for actual dinner and still have an appetite.  I was smart and took Carson in his pajamas.  It makes things a lot easier since he likes to get naked if he can get out of his clothes and my mom's house is always cold so I figured I'd kill two birds.  We put him in onesie pajamas that zip up the front and then snap across the zipper at the top.  These are becoming harder and harder to find since he needs a 5T.  I cut the feet out of them since his feet are too big and they usually make him very unsteady even if they do fit his feet.  I am lucky that he doesn't know how to work a zipper yet because if he did I would be completely out of options for keeping him dressed.

He did really well with everyone, especially since he has been terrified of one of my brother-in-laws for quite a while.  The biggest thing was I finally got to see how much Coke he was consuming at my mom's house during the day when I was at work.  Let me tell you, by the time we left I was pissed.  I would tell her no more pop and then I'd look over and see her filling up another cup for him!  At least now I know why the kid never went to bed at a decent time for me.  He was too hopped up on caffeine to settle down.

While we were there my mom and my sisters planned their Black Friday shopping trip.  I don't go.  It's too much of a hassle for me.  I'm the type of person who likes to hang at home rather than go mess with hour-long lines to get a shirt for 4 bucks when I don't need it in the first place.  Don't get me wrong, I get the people who probably wouldn't be able to afford Christmas otherwise but let's be honest, 95% of the idiots that are out fighting to get to the slowly opening doors for the marked down TV or whatever are getting it for THEMSELVES.  Anyway, I went when Baylee was a baby and had her in a stroller and some idiot woman bashed her in the head with all the bags she had on her arms and never stopped to see if she was okay or apologize or anything.  That was it for me.  I'll do my shopping online, thank you. 

Ok, off my soapbox...

On Friday Carson was listening PBS shows on his iPad.  There was an Elmo show playing that he kept saying "eeeeeeeeeee" to so I thought I would be funny and said, "ffffffffffffffff".  He looked at me like I had two heads.  He then said, "eeeeeeeeeeee" again but this time signed eat at the same time!! EAT!!  He SAID eat!!  Then at lunch I was making him some hot dogs in the microwave and when it beeped he said, "ready".  I was stunned!  He says things so monotone as if he were completely deaf but I know that he at least hears some things.  I paid attention to the microwave the next time I was making something and when it beeps 'FOOD IS READY" scrolls across the screen!!  The little shit was reading!  So happy.  I can't wait to tell LaQuita tomorrow.

He is now signing "mom" more frequently and even used it to tell Mike that I was home from the store.  He signed it and then waived a hand towards our door into the house from the garage.  Baylee asked if we could teach him how to sign sister (gently brushing your thumb closed fist, thumb sticking out, from your temple down your cheek).  I thought it was a great idea.  It only took us showing him two times and he could do it back to us.  One funny thing we have noticed that he is doing is now everything is eat.  He wants ice, he says eat.  He wants a drink, he says eat.  It's cute, like when an infant calls everyone mommy or daddy, it doesn't matter who it is. 

My parents are divorced and have been since I was really young.  Today we drove about an hour west of our house to visit my dad, step-mom and little (not really) brother and sister.  He is 26 and she is 19.  On the way out there we were playing a game in the car picking an animal and having the others in the car take turns asking questions to narrow it down until we could figure it out.  Baylee went first, then me and then Mike.  Once we had guessed his Baylee said it was her turn again.  I said no, it's Carson's turn.  "But Mom!" she said in a huff, "he can't say yes or no so how am I going to know the answer?  All he says is eat!"  It broke my heart.  I wonder if he just wishes that he could talk, or that we could understand him.  Here he was in the car listening to us chatter on about 'does it eat meat? can it walk on two legs?' and maybe he did want a turn guessing.  I have no idea.

We had an interesting conversation today at my dad's house while they were watching Carson with his iPad.  My brother brought up what it must've been like 50 years ago without the technology we have today.  How so many people with disabilities were put away in homes to rot because society wouldn't accept them.  Had they known what I know today things could've been so much better.  I can't imagine what it feels like to be trapped inside your own body, in your own mind.  It puts things into perspective and I have to admit tonight that I am feeling a little down.  Carson has had some great accomplishments this week and I'm thankful for that.

Something that has really stuck with me is probably going to sound really, really stupid.  We saw last night that Paul Walker was killed in a car wreck.  It really got me thinking and especially now that there are more details coming out about it.  But just THINK about it.  A guy who makes a living portraying a guy who races cars and does all these crazy stunts dies just outside his company in a car with a race car driver???  It's so ironic.  The saddest part about this is these guys have young kids.  It scares me to death to think what would happen to my kids if I died tomorrow.  I know deep down that Baylee would get over it, or at least understand it enough to accept it.  Carson on the other hand has no clue about death or what the word even means.  He would just think that I went to the store and never came back.  That cuts me to the core.

On the way home tonight we missed a fatal wreck by mere minutes.  I'm not kidding.  Baylee was complaining that she was hungry and she wanted Arby's which was at the next exit and since I'm not working anymore I told her that we would just eat when we got home.  We passed the exit and I continued on for about another 20 minutes to our exit.  When we were getting off the highway Mike got an alert on his phone that the highway was closed because of a multi-car accident and that Air Care and the coroner were both called to the scene.  We had just driven through the area where the crash had happened.  If we would've been delayed 5 minutes or so it would've been us or damn close.  Had we gotten off the highway and picked up food, it may have been just the right amount of time to put us there right then.  It's so crazy when you think about it like that.

So tonight I go to bed thankful for my family and the things that we have.  Tomorrow is another day and we have school again (Yay!! Preschool!!! LOL)

XX